Archive for the ‘Internet’ Category

Et wah la

January 14, 2010

After a little googling, I’ve determined that there was a serious lack in the interwebs. As far as I can tell, no one was actually compiling some of the fabulous and ridiculous translation fails from voice recognition programs.

Et wah la. VRPoetry was born. Someone had to do it. So send me your best Google Voice garbles, your weirdest translation errors… Or just call me a lot, so I can get a few more on tap.

EDIT: Okay, there is a tumblr blog. But there’s only three entries, so it doesn’t count.

I almost forgot…

January 12, 2010

Demonstrated Chicken Loan.

Somehow I left that out of my Speech Recognition Poem. Not sure how, that’s one of the best parts!

Speech Recognition Poetry Slam

January 11, 2010

Hey, it’s me.

I’m calling so late.
I think,


I guess,

i’ll just keep an eye.



I can’t remember what happens when your Daddy to do.

Gimme moves.

I think it’s better ad.
Well, stupid,

and okay.

Hope you’re doing.

I’ll grab a Mike

that next recall right.

Talk to you?
Bye bye.

How sad is it that I’ve never been able to write poetry, but given just one day, Google Voice comes up with the strangest straight-from-a-zine authentic shit? Damn it. Technology is totally building a better human. That shit had soul.


December 2, 2009

According to Google Voice, what I said to my sister:

“I know, it’s that to me, just calling to see if you wanted to do drugs before I head off to work. I’m going to right. Give me a call if you’re around in the book hi.”

What I actually said was much less interesting. Something about dogs I believe. But that is awesome. A little drugs before work, please? Got to get right!


May 22, 2009

I had the best of intentions tonight. It was a stunningly sunny day, with the fog just over the next hill blowing a cool breeze into me as I reclined on top of the ferry on my way home. Inspiring. But then I got home, and the dogs needed walking, and then I was stinky from my bike ride so I needed a bath, and then there was wine that needed drinking, and email that needed reviewing… and now it’s way past bedtime. The dogs are snoring and the roommate has passed out after too many margaritas. And so my word count shall remain static today.


May 20, 2009

So now I’m not writing at all, I’m looking at Garfield minus Garfield. An excellent way to not write.